We can move in the direction of justice, but if our personal relationships don’t become more human, we haven’t moved in the direction of the reign of God and, in the long run, we will discover that our point of arrival is just another form of tyranny.

- Arturo Paoli

Imagination

"Our culture is competent to implement almost anything and to imagine almost nothing." From The Prophetic Imagination by Walter Brueggemann.

So what are we going to do?

learn to imagine before we implement.

imagine....take back our captive minds.

Great Sadness

No matter how far to the left or to the right that I move, my brokenness always seems to follow. No matter how close in proximity to the Father I am (or think I am), it always rears its ugly head. My lust for independence, for inalienable rights, has created a chasm between the Creator Who Is Always Near and me, who seems to run as far the other way as I can go (which in reality is probably a lot shorter of a distance than I think). I am so perplexed by the love of one who did not deserve death, yet gave himself to be sin so that I could once again be righteous in my Father's sight. I know that this stuff isn't new to me, but in a way, in a much more real way, it is. What I thought at one time I knew so well, I realize that I never knew, and will never fully know. I deeply long for an intimate relationship with the one who paid a high price for my life (I still feel that I must constantly try and buy it back with my ill attempts at holiness).

"as deep calls out to deep".... I feel it within my heart, the constant whispering of forgiveness and reconciliation, redemption and acceptance, love and peace, mercy and grace. Although I must admit that it is often drowned out by my own screaming, the screaming that is chocked full of lies about damnation and loneliness, about my life not being redeemable, about HIM not loving me (and often I believe it, and I believe that often times we mistake what is loud for what is true).

The Fourth of July recently passed. All I can say that we must remember the Iraqi children who are not safely shooting off fireworks (you might say, of course not, they don't celebrate July 4th... whatever), or going to school, or playing with their families and friends, Many of them do not have those things anymore. I will not celebrate American imperialism, or the flag. I will pledge my allegiance to the only one who can bring peace, Yeshua.


I have much to learn. My heart is a mess.

When all you can see is yourself...

a thought from Abraham Joshua Heschel

"In regard to cruelties committed in the name of a free society, some are guilty, while all are responsible."

I feel your heart beating, I feel your feet moving, and I hear you voice coaxing me forward. I just stand here and act as a point of reference for your movement. I am greatly decieved and yet you poor your grace upon me lavishly...

I can hear you whisper (the unforced rhythms of grace...)

To believe.

I Love You Both (there should be a picture of an iraqi also...)

Gen 1:27

So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them.

Our world is in a reoccuring act of decreation.

maybe instead of writing in here, he calls me to be silent, to listen for the still small voice...

"We believe that the Kingdom of God is real, not an abstraction. We believe that Jesus is our king, not our figurehead"

taken from TheJesusManifesto.com

i am completely lost in trying to find myself.

i am trying to lose my life...

Karl Barth, The Ontological Argument, and Neo-Orthodoxy

Tonight I am gently reminded by my father that knowledge puffs up. I can spend much of my time in the ways of the Pharisees and Scribes but eventually I will find the glorious nature of the empty self. I seek my own praise, and I believe that I deserve it. But this is not the way of the Father. Many times we take truth as something to be mastered by our own minds, but as I spend time in reflection of moments with my earthly father (who does a good job of warming my heart with the simplicity of Christ) I realize that Truth must master me, so that eventually the Kingdom of God will be planted like a mustard seed in my heart. I do not say this to hint that I do not desire academic knowledge, but the halls of academia only traverse so far, and rightly so. My heart weighs heavy at the mention of the "still small voice" of He Who Came Before Me. The silence of His ways speaks a multitude of Truth over my finite mind. I can sit here for the rest of my days speaking of His glory (much of the time secretly dwelling and selfishly loving mine) and grace but never truly living it. I pray I find myself in His will and not in my own.

I truly desire the unforced rhythms of Grace. I want to know the held breath of hope.

Today i understood what he meant when he said, "how will i lay down in green grass fields when my soul is so afraid to...rejoice?"

Me: growing up causes me to take deeper breaths
Baxter: the air is fresher when you do...

Gently remind me Lord, I believe I need it daily.